Why a no is often better than a yes for leaders

1. leader question: How comfortable are you to say NO?

How often do you find yourself in situations where you clearly feel like saying NO, but because you want to be polite and nice, you say YES. AGAIN!!! Why is that? We often have difficulty saying NO because we have been objectified from childhood. 🛸 What? objectification means:

● Conditioning of availability 🏃‍♀️ We have been trained to always be available. However, constant availability is not a natural state, but a sign of our meritocracy. #isso Often results in: no rest, too little flow, too little sleep, chronic stress, lack of regeneration.

● Going along with things 🏫 We have learned to go along with what was demanded of us, e.g. in school, regardless of whether we wanted it or not. Often results in: unclear self, fear of rejection, FOMO.

● Pressure to perform ⏱️ External standards are predominantly set, less attention is paid to individual desires and abilities. Often results in: frustration, depression, burn out.

You see, we have learned relatively well and early to always say YES. So how can we learn to say NO better?

First, we need to understand and learn how to say a healthy NO to ourselves before we do it to others. This starts with our behaviors that are not really beneficial to ourselves #Distraction. We may learn to say NO to distractions, whether they be people, social media, food or consumption. We may learn to differentiate between urgent, important and unimportant in the flow of information that is constantly pelting us.

Second, the NO for others. A no or a rejection never feels good, so it is important to communicate clearly and appreciatively. As a team, we need to learn to stand up for not always being immediately available to super nice colleagues. For example, offer to be there later for the clustered questions, that way you stay in the flow and don't get pulled out all the time. Discuss flow with your team and allow your workflow to be scrutinized. Good questions for this are: Where have we allowed ourselves to interrupt each other? How can we organize this differently? NEINS isn't about doing without favors from now on, pushing ego trips, or poking fun at others - NO! 🚩It's about standing up for yourself, setting boundaries and communicating them clearly. #fairplay

In Short: Saying no is super important, for ourselves, for others, in everyday life, at work. Notice all your unhealthy YES's, e.g. to media, too much information, consumption, pleasing, constant accessibility. Start consciously setting boundaries, for yourself and with others. You as a leader can encourage your team and colleagues to set clear boundaries. Your clear NO will strengthen your relationship and the one in the team. Be honest and creative so that the needs of both are met. Lets do this! 💃